A viral TikTok says asking to sleep at a friend's flat after a gig treats them like a free hotel. Fair point, or is putting friends up just what friends do?
Creator @BridgetGoes said visitors should book a hotel or hostel, or go home, rather than ask a friend in the city to put them up; her video passed 2.6 million views. Author and influencer Tinx replied that she'd be offended if a friend in town for a concert didn't ask to stay.
What happened
A TikTok video by @BridgetGoes argued that asking a friend in New York to put you up after a concert, using Harry Styles's Madison Square Garden residency as the example, treats them as a free hotel. If you can't afford to stay, she said, travel home that night or don't go. The video passed 2.6 million views and drew criticism. Author and radio host Christina Najjar, known as Tinx, said she'd be offended if a friend didn't ask, as long as guests have good manners, such as leaving wine or flowers.
Why people disagree
One side says hosting costs the host space, privacy and effort, cheaper options exist, and a request from a friend is hard to refuse. The other says putting friends up is part of friendship and a thank-you gift covers the favour. Friendship expert Danielle Bayard Jackson told Yahoo that closeness matters: among close friends, a stay is often expected, but frequent requests can leave a host feeling taken advantage of.
What's still unclear
Whether the answer changes with how often someone asks and how past stays went. A 2024 YouGov poll found 61% of US adults like or love having overnight guests, while 26% dislike or hate it.
Sources
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